Finding Strength and Connection Through Horses: My Journey with Medicine Horse

By Kelley Dean

I feel incredibly fortunate to share my experience with Medicine Horse’s program

designed for breast cancer survivors. Getting involved in this program has been a

transformative part of my journey, and I’d like to reflect on how it has shaped me.

I’ve always been someone who deeply values the concept of congruence, which

means finding agreement, harmony, and compatibility in life. While I thought I

understood this term in abstract, it wasn’t until I participated in the Medicine Horse

program that I truly grasped its significance.

Growing up in a hardworking family, my

childhood was influenced by strong roots. My

grandparents—a farmer from New Mexico and

a resilient woman from Kentucky—provided a

backdrop of love and determination. Despite the

challenges we faced, horses were a constant

source of joy in our lives.

My mother found her escape in the rodeo, particularly through barrel racing. Her horses, especially Tony, and the infamous Slats—who certainly had his quirks—filled our lives with

unforgettable stories and laughter. Visiting my grandparents' farm as a child was something I always looked forward to. The warmth and fun, especially from my grandfather Calvin, created cherished memories that are forever intertwined with my love for horses.

My upbringing was also marked by sports, guided by my mom's mantra: “To succeed, work hard, and never give up.” This philosophy played a pivotal role in my life, even helping to finance my college education through softball.

However, life took a drastic turn in July 2005, when I suffered a severe neck injury in a

diving accident. After hitting the sand while trying to dive through a shallow wave, I was

left paralyzed from the neck down. Doctors informed my family that I would never walk

again, a reality they wisely kept from me. Driven by determination, all I focused on was

regaining my ability to walk.

With relentless effort and a positive mindset, I pushed through rehabilitation and

eventually walked out of the hospital. Hard work helped me rebuild my professional life

and restore my relationships.

Then, in 2021, cancer entered my life in the

form of stage II ductal carcinoma. Once again,

I told myself, “I’m ready to put in the work to

overcome this.” I faced surgeries,

chemotherapy, radiation, and more, only to

discover this battle wasn’t something I could

muscle through.

The emotional toll was profound; I found

myself stumbling and unprepared to face my

feelings honestly. Hiding my emotions became a daunting task, and eventually, I lost

the ability to confront them altogether. One morning, I woke up yearning for the joy that

my grandfather and the horses had always brought into my life. My soul craved

renewal, and I found myself wishing I could turn back time.

This is when I discovered the Medicine Horse program. I enrolled in their breast cancer

support group and was pleasantly surprised to learn that it was free of charge. I

thought, “I’ll tolerate the therapy if it means I can see the horses.”

Walking into that beautiful ranch was incredibly healing. The horses were warm,

patient, and welcoming. The therapists approached us with such care and gentleness,

immediately making me realize that this was not ordinary therapy.

Everything I thought I knew about horses and myself was about to change. A poignant moment occurred when therapist Michael told me, “This exercise isn’t something you want to muscle

through.” It struck me that horses value congruence; they connect with us only when we are our authentic selves— whether we’re feeling sad, angry, burdened, or hopeful.

Medicine Horse taught me that true strength lies in connection: connection with myself,

with the horses, and with the other courageous survivors also navigating their journeys.

Interacting with these incredible animals helped me gain a better understanding of

myself. The therapists were not only wise and insightful but also provided me with the

answers I didn’t know I needed.

Medicine Horse has truly transformed me. I've found a program that nourishes my soul.

While I’m still battling cancer, I now feel equipped with more tools and a deeper

understanding of congruence. If you ever wonder if this program truly works,

remember: the proof is in the pudding, so call me tapioca.

Thanks to contributions from donors whom I’ve never met, someone will benefit and

potentially find their strength in the same way I have.